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Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Gypsy Spirit Contained

A dream of mine has long been to live in the mountains. 

I remember a Youth Group trip I went on when I was in Middle School.  As we were driving through the Appalachian Mountains and I was awestruck by His handiwork, I got into a debate with a friend.  I had said in my exuberance that someday I would own a mountain.  My friend argued that I could not own a mountain. 



I laugh now.

Regardless of whether I ever own a mountain, I certainly never lost the desire to live in the mountains.  I picture a place far removed from "civilization" with its hustle and bustle, the rat race, the consumerism, and the politics that drive me batty.  However, this desire to settle in this mind's eye picture perfect setting clashes completely with my personality.



You see, I am a gypsy at heart.  I cannot stand to be in one place for very long.  I want to move all the time.  When I was a child, we moved four times before I was eight years old.  Maybe that is how this urge to move set in.  However, once we got to our new home in Florida, my parents had found their "heaven on earth" and have been there ever since.  During the rest of my childhood there, up until I went to college, I was hungry for change.  I felt it so deeply that by the time I did leave, I had grown to really abhor the entire area.  To this day, even when I am visiting the pieces of my heart (my sister and her family) there, I cannot stand to stay for very long.  Even while I am there, my entire body longs to be leaving.

Once I moved away to college, I was able to enact the changes I longed for.  I moved within three dorms in three semesters.  Even that was not enough to make up for the years of staying in one place.  My room, if I didn't have a roommate, changed on almost a monthly basis.  This carried on when I joined the Air Force.  My tech school rooms continually changed how they were set up (well, until regulations came down saying our rooms had to be set up a particular way.)  Even once I got to my first assignment.  I moved three times in three years, from one apartment to another, and then in with my hubby.  From there, I have slowed down quite a bit based on our assignments with military and because I can no longer just up and move.

Now, we have been assigned here for a four year tour.  This is the first time since moving away from home, that I have remained in one home for longer than a year.  Four years into this move, I am feeling that gypsy spirit start to revolt.  I long for the next move.  I long for it so much that my home is about to be turned upside down!  I keep planning rearranging the rooms.  I joked with my husband that one day he is going to come home and find the furniture nailed to the ceiling.

The itch to get to the next place is so strong. 

Don't get me wrong.  I love the community we live in.  I love the base we are assigned to.  I love the city here, and the country surrounding it.  In general, if my heart wasn't calling for the mountains, I would not mind staying here forever.....  So long as we could travel- alot! 

The military lifestyle has proven so good for my gypsy spirit.  However, now there are things that DH and I are having to face that could prove to change our lives in ways we were not expecting.  Certainly in ways we are not remotely prepared for.  Part of those changes could mean that we will be here much longer, maybe indefinitely.  This is incredibly frustrating for me because we have already been contemplating our next move.  My gypsy blood has been stirred, and is ready to purge, pack, and move on.

To consider staying ... to say that my heart has deflated is an understatement.  So for now, I have to confine the gypsy in me, as I pray for His guidance, will, and patience as we see what we do from here. 



Thursday, January 17, 2013

Promises Fulfilled



People say not to count your chicks before they are hatched. 

Typically, I try not to, because while I always have hope that something great and new is on the horizon, I also realize that whatever it is on the horizon may not fit "my" idea of great and new.

In Jeremiah 29, Jeremiah sent a letter to those who were still exiled in Babylon.  His letter was one of promise and of hope, that the Lord Himself promised to intervene and return His people to their home!  After such a long time, no doubt the Lord's people had to have felt forgotten.  How they must have worried!  How they must have grieved!  I have no doubts that they were still faithful in their beliefs, but they must have been despairing, or the Lord would not have inspired Jeremiah to sent this letter!

Today, many of us know the following verse:
"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."  Jeremiah 29 v 11

We use this verse as a daily mantra.  We add it to our prayers.  Preachers use this as a foundation for so many sermons.  Musicians sing songs based on it!  This verse stands alone quite well as a promise of hope!

I grew up having this verse committed to memory.  Granted, now, as I struggle day to day to remember the simplest things, I have to look this verse up to read it because I no longer remember it word for word.  (Thank goodness for the Bible app on my phone!)

This morning, as I was contemplating how quickly the Lord answers prayer, this verse came to mind.  You see, after I finished writing "In the Light" on Tuesday, He answered my struggle and my effort with legitimate job offers that I had only ever dreamed I would get!  Plus, two of the four projects are from fellow Christians, asking for me to work from that frame of mind!  I was and am completely blown away and humbled by HIS faithfulness to ME!   I have been in reflection ever since- thankful on one hand, hopeful on the other, and trying not to pay attention to our "wise" adage about counting our chicks.

Its in light of counting those chicks that I dove into Jeremiah 29 this morning. 

I am not an advocate for most "promise" preaching.  I think many "promise preachers" have gone over board causing men and women to believe that God WILL grant us treasures and wealth while we are here on earth, during our earthly life.  While I DO believe He does this for SOME people, and that He DOES fulfill small promises in for EVERY person at different points in their lives, I do not think that the promises He gave us were meant for this life so much as for the next- otherwise the value of Christ's sacrifice is diminished- for what need have we of treasures in Heaven when we have already been given them here?  So, I think "promise preaching" can be very misleading, planting false hope, and distracting us from our purpose in His will. 

Whew--- sorry about the tangent there--- please keep in mind, the above is just my opinion.

Anyway, I dove into Jeremiah 29, because while I do not believe He promises to just GIVE us everything we dream for during this life, He does promise "hope and a future."  What's interesting is if you continue on through the next two verses, He also tells us when we see His plan in action, it will cause us to turn even more to Him!

So let's look at these verses together:
"11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." Jeremiah 29 v 11-13

How true this is for me since Tuesday!  I am like anyone else... I tend to pray harder and more sincerely when I am hurting or needful in some way.  I am a pray-er in that I never cease praying.  A valuable lesson from my Mom- I pray with every breathe I take, so conversations with God are very real to me.  Yet, I still note that I pray harder and more sincerely when I am in need.  Granted, there is nothing wrong with this, because turning to Him when we truly need help is RIGHT!  Yet, as I look over my praying conversations, I feel a little guilty.  No matter how hard I try to be thankful first, and needy last, my prayers are riddled more with "please" than they are with "thank you."

But since Tuesday, when He answered the promise of Jeremiah 29 v 11 so quickly and so obviously, I found that verses 12 and 13 became immediate truth as I hit my knees in awe and thankfulness for His interference on my behalf!

No, I am not going to become a millionaire with the opportunities He has given me.  I will be amply blessed to make enough from these projects to be able to pay my car payment.  But what more do I need?  He KNOWS how much my family needs to LIVE.  He KNOWS how much He has already given us, and how much more responsibility we can handle.  Yet, He still gives, and He gives KNOWING the plan He has for me, for my family, and for our future.  He gives perfectly according to His promise.

And I praise Him!!!  Who cares about those chicks when I have a loving and faithful God?

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

In the Light



I typically frown on Bible Studies and Sermons that take one verse by itself to shape a lesson out of.  (Unless its like a verse from Psalms or Proverbs, where the verses really do stand alone at times.) 

However, as I was reading John 8 today, this verse stuck out to me.

"Jesus once again addressed them: "I am the world's Light.  No one who follows me stumbles around in the darkness.  I provide plenty of light to live in."  John 8 v 12 from The Message.

I think this verse really stands out to me because since I have been the stay-at-home mom again, I have been so caught up in worry.  I have really been stumbling in the dark.  I can't sleep.  I am not eating much.  I am completely drained, and tired, and on the verge of depression.  Working through the muck as I am also trying to lead an online Bible Study, be a full-time student, and still be a loving and supportive wife and mom.

This is my conviction this morning.  I have not been truly trusting Him to help us through the next several months as we face career choices, selling a house, buying a house, moving away, uprooting from friends that we consider family, taking the kiddo away from friends (this will be the first move that he is having an active role in.)  Instead, I have been worrying over finances.  I have been worrying over health issues.  I have been worrying over choices that can't be made yet.  I have been worrying over matters that are completely out of my hands!  Then I turn around and try to offer advice on the very things that I am not doing myself!

Jesus is the Light! I follow Him.  But here I am struggling in darkness when He "provide[s] plenty of light to live in!" 

My challenge this week is to refocus my gaze on Him.  Give Him my burdens and worries.   Stand up and get out of the darkness I have been wallowing in, and dance in the Light!  His Light!

Will y'all practice refocusing your gaze on Him with me?  Will y'all remember me in your prayers as I get back into His Light, His Word, and crawl back into His warm embrace, where I know that all my worries are in His capable hands?

God bless!

Monday, January 14, 2013

Blast from the Past

Every Monday over on my other blog, I write a blog called "Musical Monday."  This is my opportunity to share Positive (usually Christian) music with Military Women in hopes that it will encourage them throughout the week.

This week, I chose a song dedicated to the women who are walking through struggles, both ones I can relate to, and those that I cannot begin to imagine.  As I was searching for just the right song, I found a couple old songs from a period in my life that I was struggling through.  At the time, there was a Christian Music Video station called "Z."  I first saw and heard both of these songs on that station.  ((Still wondering why that station was taken off...sigh))

This period of time was when I left the Christian college I was attending, because I ran out of money to pay for school.  I was living alone in a city near my parents, and I was working as a Credit Union Teller.  I had just decided to join the Air Force, and was leaving in just a few short weeks.  To me, my life was a mess.  Spiritually, I was in turmoil.  I didn't want to join the Military.  I wanted to go to Bolivia or to Sudan and work as a Missionary.  There was no mission field in the Military!!!

These are the two videos that reflected my own feelings and encouraged me to take that step of Faith.

I hope you enjoy them, and maybe take away some encouragement from them!  God bless you on this Monday!!!



Thursday, January 10, 2013

The Gap

I recently started a blog geared to reach Christian women who are associated with the Military in one way or another.  There are limited Christian resources for Military Wives, and even less for Active Duty women.  Because I am a Veteran, having served in the Air Force and the Air Force Reserves, and because I am now a Military Wife, the HUGE gap between women who serve and women who support is very visible to me.  I keep hoping and praying that Military Wives are not the only ones who are reading my blog, but I fear this is the case. 

I have seen this gap most glaringly in Bible Study groups.  Sure, a few Active Duty women attend from time to time, but for those who are young, who have yet to start families, who are single, who might be single parents, the never-ending chatter that Military Wives share about hubbies and babies and homemaking make many Active Duty women feel very out of place.  I know, because I have seen it, Military Wives do their very best to reach out to these women.  However, for as much as they know of what occurs in Active Duty life, somehow Military Wives have a hard time relating to and comprehending the challenges an Active Duty woman faces.  This works the other way around as well.


The desire to start building a bridge across the gap has been on my heart for several years now.  I first noticed the gap when I was Active Duty.  Whenever I would meet Military Wives at social events, it was like we were speaking two dialects of the same language- we were not QUITE understanding each other.  When I transitioned from Active Duty to the Reserves, I noticed this gap even more.  At that point I was both serving and supporting, but still could not help but see this huge gap.  Now that I sit in a role of support as a Military Wife, I see the gap growing, and no one seems to know it is there, or are unwilling to address it if they do see it.

I believe any woman affiliated with the Military needs to know that she is not alone.  She should know that when she is in a room with other women affiliated with the Military, that whether they serve or support there is no reason to draw that invisible line.  We are on the same team, just playing different roles.  Plus many of us have performed in both roles, so we can learn from each other!  Certainly, we can draw encouragement and support from one another.

It truly breaks my heart that there is this gap.  I hope to be able to attend a military function one day where the Wives and the Active Duty Women can truly communicate with each other on a level of mutual trust, respect, and admiration. 



For all you gals reading this that might be involved with the Military on one way or another, what are your thoughts about this gap? 

Do you think there is a way to start building a bridge across that gap?

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Removing the Artificial

One of my resolutions, not just for 2013 but for my life- for the benefit of my own health as well as the health of my family, is to move to a more natural diet; to cut out as much as possible prepackaged and artificial foods that we have come to rely on so much over time.

In my pantry, there is hardly any space at all.  We have food enough to feed a small army, and yet I have been struggling for over a year on what to make for dinner!  With my own health issues really coming to a head over the past year, and many more questions than answers from the slew of Doctors I have seen, I am putting a long-standing theory of mine to a test.

A little bit of background...

I have never had any food allergies, until my child was born, at which, it seems overnight, I suddenly became lactose intolerant.  Granted, this was not officially diagnosed, simply assumed based on symptoms I was experiencing and a conversation I had with a friend who is also a Physician's Assistant. 

Not long after that unofficial diagnosis, I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and Hemiplegic migraines.

Then little over a year ago, I began having urinary trouble and severe intestinal issues.

In the past six months, everything has gotten worse by leaps and bounds, which has forced me to take seriously my symptoms.  ((Since my Fibro diagnosis, I paid little attention to symptoms relating in pain, as I just assumed they were all Fibro related, and therefore not serious enough to see a Dr for.))

Since seeing a Rheumatologist for one thing, a Neurologist for another thing, and now a Gastroenterologist for yet another thing, I have zero answers as to how to stop the symptoms and only a lot of medication to control pain, and more tests to look forward to.

The Dr's have ruled out stroke, mini-stroke, Celiac's, ulcers, lactose intolerance, and gluten/wheat allergy.  Yet the symptoms overlap and persist.

My theory...

I have long suspected, well, since my supposed lactose intolerance was so random- acutely severe one day, and then days at a time with no traces  (I never did stop eating dairy... ask my friends, they thought I was crazy!) that any allergy I might have to food products might not be to the food itself, but rather to the preservatives within those foods.

I have wanted to test that theory, but procrastinated for a while, then got busy with school and family, and then went to work again.

However, now that I am not working again, with my DH's approval and desire to see me pain free, or at least in less pain, we have decided to test this theory.

The plan...

Like I said, our pantry is full to the brim.  Unfortunately, very little in it is not pre-packed and full of artificial ingredients.  We do not have the money or the heart to just get rid of it, not even to a food pantry.  That would be foolish now that we are on a tight budget again.  So, for now we are going to reduce our meals to only one prepackaged, boxed, canned, etc item.  All else will be made by scratch, so that I know exactly what is going into our meals.

Granted, this will prolong my experiment, but I am hoping to use the transition period to get used to cooking from scratch, to making foods that I can freeze or can, and to baking from fresh ingredients.

My goal...

We will be moving shortly.  We do not have an exact time frame yet, but it is coming just the same.  My goal is to have emptied our pantry of the prepackaged items by then.  Ideally, I hope to have it restocked with true, old-fashioned staples for cooking from scratch, or canned items with ingredients I can be sure of.

My ultimate goal is to be able to be used to cooking and baking in this manner in such a way so that when we get to our next home, I can return to the work force without having to sacrifice truly healthy eating, while also being able to present my new family Dr. with my theory and results up to that point.

That's the plan at any rate.  LOL  I hope He will guide me along this new path for our family!

If you have any hints or pointers, please share them with me!  I would appreciate any and all advice as we make this transition!

God bless you!

Monday, January 7, 2013

Money Saving Mondays


One of my so-called New Year's resolutions is to find a way to make money from home.  Unfortunately, since any kind of work is so hard to come by, and honest work-from-home jobs are even fewer to come by, this Gal needed to find ways to cut the household budget that don't make the Kiddo or the DH cry.

The first major way we did this was to cut out after-school care.  Okay.  I know.  Easy cut, right?  After all, I am not working, so there is no reason to leave him there, right?  Right.  However, here, that simple deduction is saving us over $190 a month!

We have a way to go still.

There are numerous ways in which we plan to help reduce our monthly outflow of money.  I hope to share the successful choices we made with you.  Who knows?  Maybe they will be something you and your family can do as well?

And so I leave you with this other major cut that we have done since I stopped working outside the home.

We cut the cable.

Mostly. 

I called my local cable company.  We were getting the DVR package, with phone, and with Internet.  A bundled deal they say.  Right- for around $200.00 a month give or take.

I told the company to cut us back to just the Internet (which I need as long as I am attending an online University.)  Now granted, I ended up with Basic Cable AND the Internet--- according to the companies bundling, I would have paid $5.00 MORE just for the Internet. 

So, our cable bill has been cut to $50.00 a month (plus taxes, of course.)

This week, because Texas allows you to purchase your electricity from coops, I am going to research Wind Powered Energy Providers and see if I can find one cheaper than the one I am currently using.  

Come back next week, and I will fill you in!

Sunday, January 6, 2013

The Christmas Letter I Didn't Write

I love getting Christmas cards, and even more so, Christmas letters.  Even when more and more families are getting away from that tradition, I really truly desire to take the time to write one out, copy it, and send it to all my dear friends and family along with the Christmas card.  However, the past three years, like everyone else, I have just been too busy to invest the time and the money in a letter.

So- Here I go.  The Christmas Letter I didn't write. 

Dear Friends and Family,

2012 has been a year full of excitement, challenges, and triumphs.  Our little family has grown closer to each other and to God as He has blessed us in ways we could not imagine.

Our kiddo is 8 years old now!  I can hardly believe it!  He finished out the 2nd grade in a fantastic private school, and started the 3rd grade in the GT Program at a local public school.  His love for all things space related, math related, cat related, and music related keep me on my toes for sure!  He was blessed on his birthday with a HUGE gift of Lego's from a very dear friend, and now I bless that boy every time I find one with my feet!  :)  Seriously, the Kiddo's imagination knows no bounds now as he builds, destructs, and rebuilds whatever his mind creates!  His increasing interest in space inspired his Aunt to find him a very nice used telescope and he has been chomping at the bit to use it.  (He is waiting for Mommy's permission--- Mommy is waiting on a warmer evening!)

Hubby- well, since he hates for me to share anything about him on the Internet, let's just go with this: he is alive and well and the love of my life!  ;)

Then there is me.  This year has been a complete roller coaster of ups and downs, challenges, closed doors, and open windows.  I am still working on my degree in Environmental Studies.  I have begun volunteering at the local State Park, which I have loved!  I was working at a clinic, but the contract I was working under expired.  I could have waited the contract out and probably would have been rehired.  However, I knew deep down that He did not want me to.  I don't know why except that I feel a HUGE load taken off now that I am home again.  Granted, this offers its own set of unique challenges... mainly in the financial department, but I know He will provide.  So now I am working on two blogs- this one, plus "Military Women of God" (a blog created to minister to all women affiliated with the Military, as there are VERY few Bible Studies/Ministries geared for those women.)  I am also seeking freelance work from home, which has afforded me two projects so far. 

For me, this year has also been challenging in the aspect of my health.  This year some things have gotten so much worse.  As a result, our family is looking at some major diet changes and transitions.  We have almost completely cut out beef from our diet.  We rely on venison for our red meat intake now.  We are trying to cut down on the red meat intake as well.  Trying to refocus on chicken, fish, and other proteins.  For me, since I have tested negative for gluten and lactose allergies, we are also attempting to cut out processed foods (you know- Hamburger Helper, Stove Top Stuffing, Kraft Mac-n-Cheese, canned soups, canned veggies, etc).  I have an inkling that my issues are directly related to the increase in these foods since I started working- so we are trying to revert to a more all-natural diet.  So I am going to start making my own breads for sure, and going to start weaning ourselves off those processed foods as much as we can. 

So what are my New Year's Resolutions for 2013?

1. Get my family back on a healthy diet.

2.  Cut out 75% of our red meat intake; cut out 85% of our processed food intake.

3.  Find a profitable way to help support this family from home.

4.  Finish my degree by July.

5.  Learn how to can and preserve various foods, stock our pantry with those foods rather than the processed ones.

6.  Grow closer to my kiddo and my hubby!

7.  Grow closer as a family to our Provider, our God.

8.  Grow closer, myself, to my God.

I hope this letter finds you all well and amply blessed!  God bless you all!!!

~A God-blessed Woman

Starting Anew

My previous blog, "Luvin This Life," had been so grossly neglected, that I decided to delete it and start over.

A lot has happened in the three years since my last post on that blog.  In that time, my family and I have made so many changes, and have been part of so many changes. 

This time, this blog will document in pictures our time spent here in Concho Valley, our travels while we have been here, and will document the upcoming move we are facing and future travels. 

I also want to use this blog to share our transition from processed foods to natural foods.  I hope to include the challenges as well as the triumphs this transition will cause and any recipes that are successful.

My family has been so amply blessed in 2012.  I hope we can share some of those blessings with you and your family as we move into 2013.

Thank you for joining!  I look forward to learning from you as well!  :)

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